Written by Mark Patraw

A lot of people have probably never seen these, and as they provide some extra character background for some SS characters, I thought I'd type 'em up for everybody to see. I've juiced them up a little bit, but essentially they're what you see in the Game Boy game when you select your character at the beginning of the game.

Gen-an:
Gen-an's wife and son, Azami and Zakuro (Hmm…makes me think of Zankuro), are concerned for Gen-an's safety and don't want him to leave Onigami Isle. Gen-an doesn't care and tells them he's going to be the "king of magic" no matter what and he'll turn anyone to dust who gets in his way. He tells Azami to go back home. She does so, sniffling.

Galford:
Galford, as a young boy, with his puppy, Poppy, has just stowed away on a ship headed to Japan, and the two are hiding inside a barrel. He tells Poppy how he can finally live his dream of becoming a ninja, and that Poppy can be a ninja dog. Poppy, excited, barks, and Galford laughs and tells himself and Poppy that they both need to be quiet so they don't get caught.

Haohmaru:
Haohmaru is disappointed in his latest conquest, a samurai who lies on his knees, defeated, behind Haohmaru. Haohmaru, arrogant as always, remarks that there was nobody worthy to fight him and give him amusement in this village, so he moves on again.

Ukyo:
As usual, Ukyo makes no sense whatsoever. He stands, his back turned to what I presume to be Kei, and remarks, "The scent of a princess will open my closed heart." Maybe he considers Kei to be a princess, I don't know…or maybe he's referring to the flower he's always after as a princess…only Ukyo knows for sure.

Charlotte:
Alone in her throne room, the Queen of France is gloating that she will destroy all her subjects. Suddenly, the Queen senses someone watching her! It's Charlotte! Charlotte has heard everything and is greatly troubled that the thing masquerading as the Queen could sense her, even in hiding. Charlotte confronts the evil Queen. The Queen admits that she is really Ambrosia in control of the Queen's body, and Ambrosia tells Charlotte that she's too late and that France is doomed. Charlotte tries to stop the evil god, but he escapes, leaving the Queen's body behind. Fortunately, the Queen is all right, which much relieves Charlotte. Charlotte sets out, determined to stop the evil that has descended on the land.

Tam Tam:
Tam Tam swears by the spirits that he will recover the lost Parenke stone that was stolen from his village and that he will defeat all his enemies.

Earthquake:
Earthquake's little henchman interrupts his meal with news of all the disasters that have suddenly befallen Japan. The henchman remarks that many people are becoming rich by taking advantage of the calamity and stealing treasure. Pleased, Earthquake decides that he's going to go to Japan and steal all that treasure for himself! He asks his men if they're ready, and they give a resounding "Yes, sir!"

Nakoruru:
Nakoruru tells her Grandparents of the great evil that is trying to destroy the world and nature. She tells her Grandparents that she is going to stop it, that they shouldn't worry, and that she won't fail in her mission. She promises to return to them safely after she succeeds, along with Mamahaha and Chichiushi (who the hell is Chichiushi? Mamahaha's baby bird or something?)

Wan Fu:
Wan Fu moans that there are no great warriors left in China. He needs strong fighters to serve him and to help him protect China in the age of the "Three Powers". He decides to go to foreign countries to look for such warriors. His attendant apologizes for being so useless to Wan Fu. Wan Fu tells this man that he hopes his subjects will fare well in his absence and that he will return with great warriors. His attendant promises that he and everyone else will wait patiently for the return of Wan Fu, their ruler.

Jubei:
Jubei is pleased that he has finally gotten the ok (probably from the Shogun) to go to foreign countries and use the power of his Yagyu Shinkage to conquer the world. He feels there is no need to be hesitant in this mission. He remarks that in Bateran, he has heard they know tricks he doesn't. Jubei sets out to see just how powerful his Yagyu Shinkage really is…but first, there is another matter he has to take care of…(can you say Amakusa?)

Hanzo:
Alone, Hanzo confronts the evil that is Amakusa. Hanzo curses the devil, but Amakusa just laughs and says that he is taking Hanzo's son, Shinzo. Hanzo, bewildered, asks Amakusa who, or what, he really is. Amakusa just laughs and says he'll see Hanzo again soon. Hanzo begs Amakusa to wait, but Amakusa leaves, laughing. Full of sorrow, Hanzo feels the loss of his son, Shinzo, keenly and sets out to save him from Amakusa.

Kyoshiro:
Kyoshiro's dying father speaks to his son. He tells Kyoshiro that his fighting skills are beautiful like Kabuki and that he must use them to bring the beauty of Kabuki to the entire world. Saddened by his father's death, Kyoshiro vows to do just as his father said, to spread the beauty of Kabuki through his deadly ballet of swordsmanship.

Kuroko:
Kuroko, a little heart above his head (I'm not kidding), looks up at Hanzo who has just utterly destroyed his opponent (Hanzo's defeated opponent's head is stuck in the floor…I take it Hanzo had just delivered his head strike pile driver!) with boundless admiration. Amazed by Hanzo's skill, Kuroko remarks, "That's so cool…"

Hikyaku:
Courier man returns home and can't find his sister, Yuki. However, he does find a letter…it's from Amakusa himself! Amakusa tells Hikyaku that he has his sister in his castle and as a "favor", he'd like Hikyaku to kill some people for him. Amakusa goes on to say that he doesn't want to force Hikyaku to do this, but if he doesn't…well, Yuki might suffer. As a P.S., Amakusa tells Hikyaku that he's sure Yuki likes Amakusa's castle, where he's holding her, a lot better than Hikyaku's little shack. Hikyaku can't believe what's happening. He looks at the list of people that Amakusa wants killed, he reads off the first three names…Yagyu Jubei, Haohmaru, and Tachibana Ukyo…(This explains why he's always throwing bombs at the SS characters, no? ) Hikyaku doesn't like what's going on, but he swears that he will save his sister, Yuki, from Amakusa.

Amakusa:
Naked, Amakusa floats in the black darkness of limbo. Suddenly a voice calls his name. Amakusa wonders who it is. The voice identifies itself as Ambrosia, darkness itself. Amakusa says that Ambrosia's name is different than the god he worships, but Amakusa can't remember the name of his god anymore… Ambrosia tells Amakusa to remember the hatred and anger he felt at the battle of Shimabara. Reluctantly, Amakusa begins to stir as the memories return to him… Ambrosia invites Amakusa to help him bring darkness to the world.

Hairy Tater:
Betrayed by his friends and captured by the Shogun, Tater, the last hero of the potato liberation front, awaits his execution bravely. As the hour of his doom lurks nigh, Tater is taken to the Shogun's favorite McDonald's restaurant to be cast into a pit of boiling oil. Just as Tater is about to be killed, a disgruntled and violent ronin by the name of Kibagami Genjuro causes a disturbance, which allows Tater to escape. Unfortunately, in the escape, Tater was horribly disfigured and scarred beyond recognition. His spirit and sanity broken by the ordeal, the once good-hearted Tater adopts a new name, Hairy Tater, and vows to conquer the world and destroy the man who has ruined his life forever, Kibagami Genjuro. (Okay, maybe Hairy Tater isn't actually in the game…but he should have been!)